r/TrueOffMyChest May 04 '21

I tried to make my relationship work while my GF sells nudes but I just can’t do it anymore.

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u/PixelSpy May 04 '21

Yeah I think that's the first step. people who just leave relationships without trying to work things out first are the worst kinds of people, I know that from experience.

I would tell her I'm uncomfortable with it and it's making me want to leave, if she wants to continue doing what she's doing then that's her choice. She could very well think OP is totally okay with what she's doing.

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u/setzer77 May 04 '21

Yeah I think that's the first step. people who just leave relationships without trying to work things out first are the worst kinds of people, I know that from experience.

I think that people should talk about it, but I don't think they should always try to work it out.

Like if the person I was dating discovered they were asexual, or a trans man (or discovered they were a cis man and wanted to detransition), or gay. I wouldn't want to continue the relationship, but I *also* wouldn't want them to try to change or compromise themselves for my sake.

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u/LordBalzamore May 04 '21

Recently had a breakup where we skipped straight to the dumping stage, right past the addressing there’s a problem stage and the talking about it stage.

It leaves you feeling worthless and a whole bunch of other emotions. OP shouldn’t be that sort of person, maybe his SO isn’t having an easy time right now and if so that just means he should be even more supportive of her - up to the point where he can’t do it anymore.

Just leaving because you’re unhappy with something in a relationship is a selfish and mean thing to do to someone if you don’t even give them a chance to talk about it. Especially in this case where it’s just like ‘she doesn’t act like a pornstar when the cameras are off’, like that could be really damaging to her self image if she thinks she has to always keep that facade up or she’s unlovable.

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u/Bargadiel May 04 '21

It's quite a conclusion to jump to, assuming OP hasn't at least talked to her. Regardless I'm of the opinion that stuff like this should best be kind of brought up at the start, before it happens.

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u/[deleted] May 05 '21

[deleted]

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u/JMStheKing May 05 '21

He didn't say stay, he said talk. You talk to your SO about it and if they continue to do said thing, then leave. Easy