r/AskReddit May 18 '21

What is your favorite Futurama quote?

36k Upvotes

3k

u/CorkHammett May 18 '21

Brannigan:

"You see, killbots have a preset kill limit. Knowing their weakness, I sent wave after wave of my own men at them until they reached their limit and shut down. Kif, show them the medal I won."

702

u/BasedGweedo May 18 '21

"Straight out of Sun Tzu's classic text, The Art of War. Or my own masterwork, Zapp Brannigan's Big Book of War."

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568

u/MagratMakeTheTea May 18 '21

If it's alive, don't lick it.

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5k

u/TheEnygma May 18 '21

"Yup, that's whatever you were talking about for ya"

580

u/duvakiin May 18 '21

Somehow reading these quotes out of context is funnier than watching the show. To be clear, I fucking love the show.

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3k

u/BarAgent May 18 '21

“Dear lord! That’s over 150 atmospheres of pressure!”

“How many atmospheres can the ship withstand?”

“Well, it’s a spaceship, so I’d say anywhere between 0 and 1.”

1k

u/Keroro_Roadster May 18 '21

One of those perfect wait that's funnier the more I think about it scifi Futurama jokes.

One of my favorites like this is "a thin layer is still stuck to our DNA and Bender's robo or "R-NA".

But from that same episode I quote "Fifty-three years old, now I'll need a fake ID to rent ultra-porn" slightly more often.

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5k

u/Alert_Ad_6701 May 18 '21

Fry's opinion on the hypno-toad, mind control show that doesn't work on the exceptionally stupid

"This show has been going downhill since Season 3!"

1k

u/AffectionateEdge3068 May 18 '21

ALL GLORY TO THE HYPNOTOAD

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11k

u/epochpenors May 18 '21

“When do we get the free slurm?”

“Soon enough”

“That’s not soon enough!”

3k

u/Brodyssey97 May 18 '21

"Who are those horrible orange creatures over there?"
"Why, those are the Grunka Lunkas! They work here in the Slurm factory."
"Tell them I hate them!"

2k

u/IronicGate May 18 '21

“Grunka Lunka dunkitty darmed-guards”

“SHUT THE HELL UP”

721

u/msico May 18 '21

Asking questions in school is a great way to learn,

If you try that stuff here you might get your legs broke!

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1k

u/Racket_the_Bard May 18 '21

Whimmy Wam Wam Wozzle!

540

u/spyne-au May 18 '21

Party on, contest winners

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2k

u/frodosbitch May 18 '21

I always liked the ones with a bit of actual science behind them.

  • no fair! You changed the outcome by measuring it!

  • “Professor – “Dear lord, we’re under more than 150 atmospheres of pressure!” Fry – “How many atmospheres can the ship stand?” Professor – “Well, its a spaceship, so I’d say anywhere between zero and one”

  • Mind the Keeler Gap (a gap in Saturn’s rings with a small moon in it)

  • Third Third and Third milk

  • Bender: [shivering] It's so cold, my processor is running at peak efficiency.

636

u/writeorelse May 18 '21

This is what you get when guys with math and science PhDs become the most over‐qualified cartoon producers ever!

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7k

u/inframankey May 18 '21

“And Fry, you’ve got that brain thing.”

“I already did!”

906

u/demostravius2 May 18 '21

I'm having... what's it called.. a headache with pictures

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2k

u/Duncan_Zephyr May 18 '21

Is the Space Pope reptilian?

576

u/scsm May 18 '21

Theeeeeeeeeee space pope!

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5k

u/2ndNicestOfTheDamned May 18 '21

In the end, it was not guns or bombs that defeated the aliens, but that humblest of god's creatures. The Tyrannosaurus Rex.

1k

u/BagOfToenails May 18 '21

There's a small possibility that one of them just said something about...

The scary door

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4k

u/JagBak73 May 18 '21

Usually I keep my sadness pent up inside where it can fester quietly as a mental illness.

730

u/Abe_Odd May 18 '21

That's what I do with my stupid.

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10k

u/Chadopolis May 18 '21

“Get a room!” “We’re in our room” “Then lose some weight!”

739

u/Athelis May 18 '21

I think John DiMaggio has said this is his favorite Bender line too.

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21k

u/CeraphFromCoC May 18 '21 edited May 18 '21

"If we hit that bullseye, the rest of the dominoes should fall like a house of cards. Checkmate."

2k

u/Horst665 May 18 '21

"You know, I find the most erotic part of a woman is the boobies."

801

u/Pardoism May 18 '21

The quickest way to a girl's bed is through her parents. Have sex with them and you're in.

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4k

u/warmaster_whorus May 18 '21

Asteroids... The icebergs of space, perhaps by Jack knifing from one to the next well get some sort of boost or something.

2k

u/BrainstormsBriefcase May 18 '21

Now there’s a route with some chest hair!

1k

u/VoiceSC May 18 '21

Kif, if there's one thing I don't need right now it's your "I don't think that's wise" attitude.

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1k

u/Jewgoslav May 18 '21

"Kiff, fetch me my reading shorts."

1k

u/powahserg May 18 '21

Kiff, I have made it with a woman. Inform the men.

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2k

u/ScavBobRatPants May 18 '21

"And Kiff, have the boy lay out my formal shorts."

"The boy sir?"

"You Kiff. You lay out my formal shorts."

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730

u/thuktun May 18 '21

"Kiff! Your toilet is set to stun, not kill."

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15k

u/sli_phox May 18 '21

Good news everyone...I have terrible news!

4k

u/breachgnome May 18 '21

My favorite was always "News, everyone!"

2k

u/AdamBombTV May 18 '21

"If you need me, I'll be in the ANGRY dome".

Love it.

427

u/12edDawn May 18 '21

"Now you're probably all wondering why I've gathered you in the accusing parlor..."

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4k

u/Upsideunderdown May 18 '21 edited May 18 '21

Farnsworth to Fry: " oooh, a lesson in not changing history from Mr. I'm My Own Grandpa "

1k

u/AffectionateEdge3068 May 18 '21

I did do the nasty in the past-y.

908

u/chownrootroot May 18 '21

Verily, and that past nastification is what shields you from the brains. You are the last hope of the universe.

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7k

u/EnhancementShaman May 18 '21

No fair! you changed the outcome by measuring it!

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4k

u/tompettyhs May 18 '21

“Don’t you worry about Planet Express, let me worry about blank.”

1k

u/Altiloquent May 18 '21

My only regret is that I have bonitis!

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515

u/ArtistPasserby May 18 '21

I still use “awesome to the max” because of that episode.

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608

u/MasteringTheFlames May 18 '21

Blank? BLANK?? You're not looking at the big picture!

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291

u/Koolaidguy541 May 18 '21

Sharks don't have necks!

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8k

u/jsu9575m May 18 '21

"What makes a man turn neutral? Lust for gold? Power? Or were you just born with a heart full of neutrality?"

3k

u/Fatspatrock May 18 '21

"all I know is my gut says maybe"

749

u/W0lfprud3 May 18 '21

"Tell my wife I said, hello"

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3k

u/lostmonkey70 May 18 '21 edited May 18 '21

"If I don't survive, tell my wife hello."

924

u/smorgasfjord May 18 '21

"Live free or don't."

1k

u/SuperKami-Nappa May 18 '21

“You’re neutralness, it’s a beige alert”

1k

u/gambit_makes_it_rain May 18 '21

"I have no strong feelings, one way or the other."

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21k

u/GambloreReturns May 18 '21

I’m having one of those headaches with pictures.

Do you mean an idea?

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7k

u/BecauseOfTromp May 18 '21

Scruffy believes in this company.

3k

u/RavenkingXXX May 18 '21

Scruffy gonna die, the way scruffy lived.

1k

u/Sagebrush_Slim May 18 '21

A’yep.

549

u/Doooobles May 18 '21

/licks thumb and turns page

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1k

u/Cuchullion May 18 '21

"I'm just a man, and you're just janitorial equipment."

812

u/drkensaccount May 18 '21

"In another city, we could be anyone we want."

734

u/almightysasquatch92 May 18 '21

Please go, before i beg you to stay

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833

u/Doooobles May 18 '21

Boilers and torlets, torlets and boilers. And that one boilin torlet. Fire me iff’n you dare.

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13k

u/LanceMcDashing May 18 '21

Nixon: Hello, Morbo. How's the family?

Morbo: Belligerent and numerous.

Nixon: Good man. Nixon's pro-war and pro-family.

3k

u/buddhaftw May 18 '21

Now listen here you drugged out communists

2k

u/ISNT_A_ROBOT May 18 '21

Nixon: “In our darkest hour we can stand erect, with proud, upthrust bosoms”.
Fry: “Anyone who laughs is a communist”

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1k

u/USS_Barack_Obama May 18 '21

Computers may be twice as fast as they were in 1973 but your average voter is as drunk and stupid as ever.
The only one who's changed is me. I've become bitter and, let's face it, craaaazy over the years.
And when I'm swept into office I'll sell our children's organs to zoos for meat and I'll go into people's houses at night and wreck up the place!

697

u/13pts35sec May 18 '21

The warble in his voice when he says crazy is just perfect

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22k

u/yellowcan May 18 '21

I'm so embarrassed I wish everyone else was dead

3k

u/tiredmentalbreakdown May 18 '21

This is the one I quote the most.

4k

u/[deleted] May 18 '21 edited 15d ago

[deleted]

436

u/Smanginpoochunk May 18 '21

“Compare your lives to mine and kill yourselves!!” Sticks out to me. Probably because he was just a head with money and that’s it when he said it.

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5k

u/PlaneCrazy787 May 18 '21

I've lost more patients than he's even treated! - Dr. Zoidberg

720

u/Joffreys_Greasy_Cunt May 18 '21

I have more skill in my little claw than you do in your entire carapace!

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9k

u/psychedelicdevilry May 18 '21

“Sir it’s not necessary or wise to be naked”

“Oh foo you sound just like my tennis instructor”

1k

u/GlitterInfection May 18 '21

My favorite Farnsworth line is when he’s briefly dating a younger woman:

“Some say I’m robbing the cradle. I say she’s robbing the grave!”

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3k

u/The_Stoned_Bard May 18 '21

WITH MY LAST BREATH, I CURSE ZOIDBERG!!

  • Professor Farnsworth
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3k

u/ColHappaBlap May 18 '21

"Perfectly symmetrical violence never solved anything"

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7k

u/porkybacon90 May 18 '21

Fry: Leela, you have to get me out of here. It's horrible! Eating scraps, letting my waste drop where I stand like an animal in the zoo. Leela: Animals go on the corner. Fry: The corner! Why didn't I think of that?

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2k

u/gabbybookworm May 18 '21

“I can explain! You see, it used to be milk, and well...time makes fools of us all.”

526

u/CyberGrandma69 May 18 '21

DIRTY BOY! DIRTY DIRTY DIRTY!

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14k

u/PerpetuallyVerdant May 18 '21

Ah, she's built like a steakhouse but handles like a Bistro!

4k

u/DatedTVReference May 18 '21

Curse you, gravity! You win again!

2k

u/buddhaftw May 18 '21

It is not uncharted, you lost the chart

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8k

u/Inoffensive_Account May 18 '21

Why does Ross, the largest friend, not simply eat the other five?

1k

u/mikhel May 18 '21

It is true what they say. Women are from Omicron Persei 7, men are from Omicron Persei 9.

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993

u/DatedTVReference May 18 '21

Perhaps they are saving it for Sweeps Week

406

u/Imma-Cut-Yo-Dick May 18 '21

It's a Joey heavy episode anyway

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3k

u/Cometguy7 May 18 '21

You are technically correct, the best kind of correct.

1k

u/ThriftAllDay May 18 '21

"Don't quote me regulations. I co-chaired the committee that reviewed the recommendation to revise the color of the book that regulation's in... We kept it grey!"

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1k

u/tiredmentalbreakdown May 18 '21

"This is the worst kind of discrimination. The kind against me." - Bender

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4k

u/bofkentucky May 18 '21

Farnsworth : This is the perfect chance for Fry to try out my new anti-pressure pills.
[opens a bottle and a giant pill falls out]
Fry : I cant swallow that.
Farnsworth : Well, then good news. It's a suppository.

2k

u/ReallyHadToFixThat May 18 '21

Dr. Zoidberg : My home! It burned down! How did this happened?

Hermes Conrad : That's a very good question.

Bender : [picking a lit cigar from the ashes] So that's where my cigar was.

Hermes Conrad : That just raises further questions!

718

u/Dejavu3 May 18 '21

This is from the mermaid episode right? When zoidberg has a cute little seashell house?

876

u/Budgiesaurus May 18 '21

Had. Had a cute little seashell house.

It burned down.

306

u/Simpull_mann May 18 '21

Look at me! Zoidberg! Homeowner!

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1k

u/ScavBobRatPants May 18 '21

"As you know, the key to victory is the element of surprise. SURPRISE!" - 25 Star General Zapp Brannigan

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6k

u/SchericT May 18 '21

You can’t have your characters say how they feel! That makes me feel angry!

I’ll have a Fuzzy Naval and the girliest drink in the house for the lady. Two Fuzzy Navels coming right up.

1k

u/TummyDrums May 18 '21

Where's the little umbrella? That's what makes it a scotch on the rocks!

394

u/Unrellius May 18 '21

Mix those mixed nuts. I see two almonds touching!

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945

u/doghome107 May 18 '21

I need something to loosen up. (Gets handed a screwdriver)

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4k

u/Red_AtNight May 18 '21

You know what the worst part about being a slave is? They make you do all this work, but they never pay you or let you go.

That's the only part about being a slave...

1k

u/grassytoes May 18 '21

You know what else sucks about slavery? The hours!

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2k

u/vettech87 May 18 '21

Uncle Vladimir: Come Bender, you'll like being dead.

Bender: That's what they said about being alive!

534

u/moshmore May 18 '21

I choose to believe, what I was programmed to believe!

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4k

u/LaternsintheMorning May 18 '21

Do a flip!

789

u/Sagebrush_Slim May 18 '21

If I can’t stamp the forms, I’ll stamp the pavement with my flabby body!

242

u/definetly_ahuman May 18 '21

Use another method that won’t damage your liver! Other people need it, ya know!

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2k

u/JenBunny06 May 18 '21

The great brain am winning again!!! I are the greetest!!! And now I am leaving the earth...for no raisin!!!!!!!

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4k

u/shadowball46 May 18 '21

Fry: What do you say the three of us grab a six-pack and watch the universe end?

Bender: Hear! Hear! That's basically what I do every day.

1k

u/bigchungus69____ May 18 '21 edited May 18 '21

"THE VAST EMPTINESS" shakes can

"Yeah, yeah I can take a hint"

Edit: I am so fucking happy that my top liked comment is a Futurama quote. It is my favourite show of all time.

802

u/Almainyny May 18 '21

“In the year 1 million and a half! Mankind is ruled by a giraffe!”

497

u/[deleted] May 18 '21 edited 19d ago

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15k

u/downsouthcountry May 18 '21

The spirit is willing, but the flesh is spongy and bruised!

4k

u/benji_014 May 18 '21

I never thought I’d die like this, but I always really hoped.

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270

u/CambriaKilgannonn May 18 '21

"I could fit if I didn't have these damn arms!"
Also "Good news everyone!"

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276

u/drunkjohnny May 18 '21

Professor: I’ve finally been able to make those government mandated upgrades you’ve all been suing me about 😂

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1k

u/Specter0621 May 18 '21

"I guess if you want children beaten you're going to have to do it yourself"

1k

u/Aardvark_Man May 18 '21

"Have you ever tried simply turning off the TV, sitting down with your children, and hitting them?"

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250

u/NotSteve333 May 18 '21

No, it’s cheaper just to have you die

1k

u/InsaneJedi7 May 18 '21

Did everything just taste purple for a second?

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761

u/Oriahatch May 18 '21

Fry: “I know Big Vinny said he was giving me the kiss of death, but I still think he was gay.”

Leela: “Did he use his tongue?”

Fry: “...a little”

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1k

u/Beyond__Words May 18 '21

"Why am I all sticky & naked? Did I miss something fun?"

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2k

u/SuperKami-Nappa May 18 '21 edited May 18 '21

I now present you with the Academy prize, which we confiscated from Dr. Wernstrom after it became apparent that he was a jackass.

360

u/Via-Kitten May 18 '21

We call our cat WERMSTROM just so we can yell at them like the professor

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5k

u/EpicBlinkstrike187 May 18 '21

Your music’s bad and you should feel bad

-Dr Zoidberg

228

u/Anglofsffrng May 18 '21

HURRAY! Now Zoidberg's the popular one!

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239

u/MyNimples May 18 '21

"These boys must have hero in their bones, and you, ma'am, must have heroine in your veins."

1k

u/codemeister126 May 18 '21

Leela : I've been a fool. A fully justified, prudent fool.

[touches Fry's hands] 

Leela : Aaah! They're so cold!

The Robot Devil :  And yet hell is so hot! Ahh ha ha hah!

The Robot Devil :  Can I have my hands back now?

Fry : No!

The Robot Devil : You're not nice!

295

u/ihatepulp May 18 '21

The robot devil is one of the best characters in the series imo

155

u/anotherkeebler May 18 '21 edited May 18 '21

You may have to "metaphorically" make a deal with the "devil." And by "devil," I mean Robot Devil. And by "metaphorically," I mean get your coat.

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3k

u/smartypants333 May 18 '21

Uranus?!!, We changed the name of that plant to stop that joke forever!

What did you change it to?

Urectum!

171

u/lachjeff May 18 '21

Let me locate it for you

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1k

u/guac-rocks May 18 '21

"Give em the clamps, Clamps!"

"Gee, you think? You think that maybe I should use these clamps that I use everyday at every opportunity?!"

308

u/Scrambles420 May 18 '21

Hey we should name him clamps!!

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4k

u/colonelmuddypaws May 18 '21

"You can't like, OWN property man!" "I can, but that's because I'm not a penniless hippy!"

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5k

u/EdgarAllanPoe9 May 18 '21 edited May 18 '21

"Sometimes when you do things right, people won't be sure you've done anything at all"

1k

u/lzgrimes May 18 '21

I was God once..

2k

u/AffectionateEdge3068 May 18 '21

I know. I saw. You were doing well until everyone died.

485

u/kavono May 18 '21

This is my favorite Futurama quote, without question.

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281

u/datruesurfer May 18 '21

Bender, being God isn't easy. If you do too much, people get dependent on you, and if you do nothing, they lose hope. You have to use a light touch. Like a safecracker, or a pickpocket.

Or a guy who burns down a bar for the insurance money!

Yes, if you make it look like an electrical thing.

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563

u/DriftingPyscho May 18 '21

That episode's writing was so good.

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284

u/RunningInSquares May 18 '21

Glad someone else had this one. That's not just my favorite Futurama quote, but my favorite TV/Movie quote of all time.

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639

u/Kreslev May 18 '21

Men, you're lucky men. Soon you'll all be fighting for your planet. Many of you will be dying for your planet. A few of you will be forced through a fine mesh screen for your planet. They will be the luckiest of all.

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602

u/Im_Not_Nobody May 18 '21

“Tell them I hate them”

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1k

u/kaaaaaaahn May 18 '21

Fry: Is that a hobbit? Bender: No, that’s a hobo and a rabbit, but they’re making a hobbit!

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1k

u/vik_singh May 18 '21

I choose to believe what I was programmed to believe!

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570

u/LanceMcDashing May 18 '21

Bender : Pfft! Bodies are for hookers and fat people!

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u/OldeFortran77 May 18 '21

That just raises further questions!

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566

u/NineFourEleven May 18 '21

Fry (emerging from vat of goo): Hey, where's my shoes?

Or

Bender: Hey, check out the palm tree! It only gets sick when I cook brunch! How's that for a coincidence, Professor? With all your precious science!

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1k

u/nixon_jeans May 18 '21

Four identical castles! Each more identical than the last.

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2k

u/[deleted] May 18 '21

To shreds, you say?

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1k

u/DrankTooMuchMead May 18 '21 edited May 19 '21

Hermes: "This is coming out of YOUR paycheck!"

Zoidberg: cries

Edit: This is the most upvotes I have ever gotten on anything from 4 years of Reddit.

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1k

u/guitarino May 18 '21

"I'm gonna build my own theme park with blackjack and hookers!"

732

u/Poxi-Poxi May 18 '21

"You know what- forget the park!"

432

u/cATSup24 May 18 '21

"-- and the blackjack!"

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524

u/Knobgobblinn May 18 '21

If anyone needs me, I'll be in the angry dome.

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1k

u/Topgun157 May 18 '21 edited May 18 '21

But he just said woo!

No, that was air escaping from the folds of his fat... woo!

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1k

u/LanceMcDashing May 18 '21

I find the most erotic part of a women is the boobies.

The quickest way to a womens heart is through her parents, sleep with them and you're in.

You'd sacrifice this beautiful woman for a moderately attractive ape? You've been smoking some bad granola.

She's built like a steakhouse, but she handles like a bistro.

785

u/2jake May 18 '21

If I said you had a beautiful body, would you take off your pants and dance around a little?

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758

u/Blue--Blue--Blue May 18 '21

"Oh I'm sorry, I thought you was corn"

376

u/DrShitbird May 18 '21

“Now I may just be a simple country hyper-chicken, but I know when we’re finger licked.”

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1k

u/KeithInk May 18 '21

"Live fast, die young, leave behind a pretty corpse. That's what I always say." "You should say something else." Here's a link.

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153

u/lcdrambrose May 18 '21

Bender: Life is about decisions. Make the wrong ones and you'll wind up face down in a pool of your own blood and urine.

Zoidberg: Still, to have your own pool!

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443

u/Sekiu May 18 '21

"Im gonna get you soo many lizards"

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689

u/I_might_be_weasel May 18 '21

"Wow, Fry, I've never seen anyone so addicted to Slurm."

"This is nothing. Back in high school, I used to drink 100 cans of cola a week. Right up until my 3rd heart attack."

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436

u/kablamo May 18 '21

“Why is there yogurt in this hat?!”

“It used to be milk, but, well time makes fools of us all”

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136

u/Nathan-asian May 18 '21

Professor Farnsworth, "That's because Mars is an uninhabitable wasteland, much like Utah."

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2k

u/atmosphericslug May 18 '21

“Shut up baby, I know it.” I say that to my wife all the time. Drives her nuts

191

u/BlatantlyThrownAway May 18 '21

"Bender honey, we love you" "Shut up baby, I know it!" Pimp walk

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425

u/bb12102 May 18 '21

Tell my wife, hello.

212

u/SuperKami-Nappa May 18 '21

All I know is my gut says maybe

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418

u/Technical-Echo-13 May 18 '21

Friends! Help! A guinea pig tricked me!

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391

u/wehosh May 18 '21

Do I preach to you when you're stoned in the gutter? No.

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608

u/sleepyj910 May 18 '21

Like my granny used to say, in her tar-paper shack on Montego Bay, if you want a box hurled into the sun, you've got to do it yourself.

Joey: They're coming straight toward our proximity. Maybe you should give 'em the clamps, Clamps.

Clamps: Gee, you think? You think that maybe I should use these clamps that I use every day at every opportunity?

Don't quote me regulations. I co-chaired the committee that reviewed the recommendation to revise the color of the book that regulation's in... We kept it grey!

Lucy Liu robot : I'll always remember you, Fry...

Lucy Liu robot : [monotone voice] MEMORY DELETED.

Yes I picked 4 bite my shiny metal ass

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124

u/theblackmanofreddit May 18 '21

Bender- “You know I was God once.”

God- “Yes I saw that. You were doing a good job until everyone died.”

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799

u/quiet_desperado May 18 '21

"I was born in 200 log cabins."

-multiple personality robotic Abraham Lincoln.

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123

u/ironXbutterfly May 18 '21

No one insults the turtles!

119

u/wesmas May 18 '21

"If you two are done being stupid."

"I had more, but you go ahead."

1k

u/Altiloquent May 18 '21

"Windmills do not work that way! Good night!"

So many opportunities to use this quote in every day situations

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525

u/metric-poet May 18 '21

"Look at me! I'm Dr. Zoidberg: homeowner!"

234

u/OldeFortran77 May 18 '21

You still have Zoidberg. You ALL still have Zoidberg.

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686

u/SheitelMacher May 18 '21

You're the kind of guy who visits Jerusalem and doesn't want to see the Sexeteria!

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110

u/MinstrelOfFunk May 18 '21

If I poach Fry's lower horn am I any better than this man with his demented foot-lust? Yes, but not by enough.

504

u/youfailedthiscity May 18 '21

This must be one of those Jefferson Starships I've heard so much about.

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318

u/DoctorPooPooHead May 18 '21

It was almost the perfect crime, but you forgot one thing: Rock crushes scissors....but paper covers rock. And scissor cuts paper. Kif, we have a conundrum.

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817

u/FaxanaduJesus May 18 '21

Grunka lunka dunkity darmed-guards... Bender: Shut the hell up!

351

u/JayGold May 18 '21

Tell them I hate them!

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290

u/omegakingauldron May 18 '21

"I can't hate what's essentially me, I love me!"

444

u/chappiespappy May 18 '21

The candle that burns twice as bright, burns half as long... mmmhmmm -Scruffy the Janitor

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94

u/BootlegBoote May 18 '21

“This is the moment you’ve been training for all yesterday afternoon”

87

u/Carolyi May 18 '21

Fry: isn't there anything else you can tell me?

Orphanarium guy: no, nothing that wouldn't be a waste of your time.

Fry: that's impossible beacuse my time is worthless!

I have small kids and everytime they fall I quoue Zapp 'you win again gravity!'

89

u/thecoolestbitch May 18 '21

And this is where I keep various lengths of wire.

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92

u/raflcopter May 18 '21

Fry, to Bender: "You've been drinking too much, or too little. I forget how it works with you."

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87

u/Kotori425 May 18 '21

"It's a miracle! And not one of those bogus everyday miracles, like a sunrise." -Leela