r/AskReddit May 04 '21

So, what’s your plan for seducing Bill Gates?

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u/The_Realest_Adam May 04 '21

Will twerking cause the chip to shift or malfunction? Asking for a friend.

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u/irrelevantadvisor May 04 '21 edited May 04 '21

No, the chip is designed & tested keeping in mind all the trends like twerking,wap etc. It's construction is as sturdy as it gets.

The only possible way you can destroy it is by using essential oils.

They are too strong & highly effective in destroying not only these chips but also some of our special 5g equipments (which we strictly use for communication purposes only*).

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u/MelonheadGT May 04 '21

Shungite

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u/Russian_For_Rent May 04 '21

Anyways, um... I bought a whole bunch of shungite rocks, do you know what shungite is? Anybody know what shungite is? No, not Suge Knight, I think he's locked up in prison. I'm talkin' shungite. Anyways, it's a two billion year-old like, rock stone that protects against frequencies and unwanted frequencies that may be traveling in the air. That's my story, I bought a whole bunch of stuff. Put 'em around the la casa. Little pyramids, stuff like that.

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u/ChocoBrocco May 04 '21

forsenCD MY MAN

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u/koos_die_doos May 04 '21

Username checks out.

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u/ItzLog May 04 '21

Ahhhh...I see.

You're preparing your Shungite for the Orgone Trail. Smart. Very very smart.